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Dear Harriette

Dear Harriette by Harriette Cole

Impending beach trip causes trepidation DEAR HARRIETTE: I go to the beach every summer, and I am looking forward to it again this year. I have a bit of trepidation, too. I have gained a lot of weight. As much as I like to sit out on the beach and tan and walk around and collect…

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Affluent friend doesn’t want relationships to change

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have had a couple of financially good years recently. At the same time, I know that a couple of my closest friends have been suffering. I do my best to be supportive. For example, we used to go out to eat a lot. Now, I invite them over for drinks or dinner…

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Squabble at work worries leader’s confidant

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am in the onboarding process for a new project, and one of the principals is worrying me. There is a lot of tension in leadership. I have the ear of one of the leaders, and right now all I’m hearing is moaning and groaning about internal feuding. It’s making me worry that…

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Husband upset by partner’s sensual dream

DEAR HARRIETTE: From out of nowhere, I had a dream that was extremely provocative. Next thing you know, I was having a spontaneous orgasm, even though nobody touched me — including myself. It was amazing and highly unusual. Nothing like that has ever happened to me. Meanwhile, I woke my husband up with the squirming…

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Acquaintance considers reaching out

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just saw a story in my local newspaper about the company where the mother of one of my daughter’s friends works. It was terrible. The company is being accused of discrimination, and it looks like a lawsuit is imminent. The woman I know has an important job at the company. While it…

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Girlfriend questions boyfriend’s sexuality

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been dating this guy for a while, and I can’t shake the feeling that he might be gay. There is something about his mannerisms and demeanor that stick out to me in a different way than the other heterosexual men I’ve dated in the past. He’s kind, considerate and very thoughtful, but…

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Fiancee insists on over-the-top wedding

DEAR HARRIETTE: My fiancee wants a luxurious wedding and refuses to compromise on her wishes even though I’m the one who works, and we would be much better off using that money in other ways. She argues that this is the only time in our lives when we will have such an occasion, but I…

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Single reader wants to get comfortable being alone

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been single for a while now, and I’m starting to feel overwhelmed by the prospect of finding someone new. I want to take this time to focus on myself and what I need. It’s important for me to build confidence in myself and know that I can thrive alone if I need…

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Despite success, reader suffers health setbacks

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am embarrassed to say that I suffer from almost all of the chronic health problems that commonly befall Black people in this country. I feel like such a failure in this regard. Outside of my health, I am killing it at work and have a good life. I checked off all the…

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Dear Harriette By Harriette Cole

Boss lacks understanding when employee gets sick DEAR HARRIETTE: All of a sudden, I got really sick. I woke up one day and felt like garbage. I had so much work to do that I went to work anyway, but then I realized that I needed to take time off to get better. I don’t…

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